Latest Entries

3.85% Drunk

Day 78 of this journey and for the last three nights I’ve had a bourbon and coke before bed. No wine, no blackouts but still troubling. That means out of 78 days I’ve been sober 96.15% of the time. That feels better than thinking I’ve just screwed up. I looked up the difference between a … Continue reading

Ramblings

  This weekend I’ve been all alone… My kids and husband have gone out of town for the weekend and won’t be back until late Sunday evening so I have a weekend to myself. I’m 17 days sober and part of me worried that I would find a reason to drink…  It’s not like anyone … Continue reading

Double Digits

Today is Day 10… Yay me.  I’ve been following all my blogs, working with Belle  and using the SmartRecovery program these past 10 days to try and help me stay the course.  I’ve been hesitant to tag myself with the AA label and admit that I’m an alcoholic, it seems so negative so I’ve loved … Continue reading

Changing Colors

I feel like the changing colors of my bruises  are some sort of analogy for how my thoughts are trying to process this resolution of mine to say never again alcohol, never again. Bruises happen, temporary reminders of moments many would like to forget, especially as you watch it through a rainbow of red, blue, purple, black, … Continue reading

This is my Bottom

This is my Bottom

I’m tired, I’m fed up and I apparently have now been giving a second chance by someone (God or whoever you believe in) due to events from yesterday. I did a whole sober  January and felt great and fell off in February and then back had stretches of a few days but I always ended … Continue reading