Askhole….

That’s me… It’s funny how many different ways I’ve asked for help and then just ignored the advice… Granted I wasn’t ready so that makes it ok, or at least in my mind it does, but then I’m sure people were tired of me asking… What’s funny is that right now the only thing I have under control (tenuous at best) is my drinking… What ย about the rest?

—ย I spend too much and now we have credit card debt to show for it

— I eat too much and now my fat pants are tight

— I run my mouth too much, it’s ruined friendships

— I picked up a cigarette at 18 and didn’t put them down for a decade

–enter alcohol and I drank too much

— I say “yes” too much and don’t value my time enough

— I could go on and on, probably the one reason when I was younger I never experimented with drugs, I was afraid that’d be another issue

So I guess the question is, I seem to have figured out however briefly how to flip the switch on the alcohol but what about the rest… What in my brain makes me do “too much” with whatever it is? I hate to say I have an addictive personality because that just sounds like a cop out… What can I do to flip the switch to make my brain be “normal” … or whatever normal is!!!

AGGHHHHH!!!! BTW… Still sober, 27 Days today!

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10 thoughts on “Askhole….

  1. Well done on 27 days. It’s going to take time to fix all of these things that look broken. It took me a whole year last year (majority of the year sober) to climb out of debt. Debt I wouldn’t have been in if I werent drinking. I know it might feel overwhelming because there is so much you want to improve but just take it easy and try to take small steps. Small steps every day, and keep looking after yourself. xxx

    Liked by 3 people

  2. It’s not often you find an alcoholic or someone who abuses alcohol not abusing something else. I would say that it’s a rarity. We all have our other things. For me, I certainly had my other “reaches”. Post-sobriety it’s still sugar and/or food. I have had self-pity. Or obsessing about running. I get into something and I *really* get into something. I don’t necessarily believe in addictive personalities, but I understand the notion.

    Like putting down the booze, getting my head around some of my other excesses is not an overnight deal. I acknowledge some things, others I may be in the dark about. But it’s about balance, and about the idea of “what am I hiding from?” When I find that answer, then I can tackle the other stuff.

    Those things you list are very common. Don’t be dismayed! One thing at a time ๐Ÿ™‚ But awareness is the key!

    Paul

    Liked by 1 person

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