Do-Over

Remember being a kid and playing a game and someone would always yell inevitably, “Do-Over”…my brother did that a lot since he didn’t like losing.  Well I’m here looking for my “Do-Over” because they don’t lie when they say one leads to more.. One does!

Great January for me, 30 days sober, whoop whoop. Enter pink cloud of complacency.  Maybe I don’t have a problem, I’ve beat it, I’m good… not so much. One drink leads to many and I drank off and on the ENTIRE month as if I never stopped and you know what else… FEBRUARY officially sucked and I’m glad it’s gone.  I stayed sick and chopped a big hunk out of my finger cooking (sober at that point)…Not to mention the constant negative voice in my head screaming at how worthless I am, that I can’t do anything right, I will never win this battle with the wine witch/wolfie/drink more voice…I officially don’t like that voice and do recall in January that the farther out I went from drinking the smaller and more far away that voice sounded…so the solution, back to the no drinking, not moderation for me, just no drinking period!

Day one… Sober!

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9 thoughts on “Do-Over

  1. That’s the thing with the ego / alcoholism / the Voice – when things seem to be going well (i.e. sober), the voice starts to tell us “hey, see? Things weren’t *that* bad, were they? you just needed some rest. Now we’re all good, aren’t we?” That’s when things fall apart. At least they do when we take too much stock in that voice! The ego rebuilds.

    The good news is we can get another shot at this, like you are now. Take the lesson, and believe me, even after many years, I *still* get that voice every now and then – “Hey Paul, a beer would sound good now eh? [I’m Canadian, so my voice is too] A beer wouldn’t hurt.” This is where I push the thought away like I would swat a fly by my face.

    Glad you’re back!

    Liked by 2 people

    • That sage advice and so true. I kept thinking that at some point I could just moderate it as I have in the past but I can’t seem to find that switch this time so it’s better for me to just abstain.

      My voice speaks in a drawl and it always says “hey y’all, hold my beer and watch this!”😀

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Welcome back GAgal! Glad to see you posting again. 😀
    I have had that little voice in my head tell me numerous times that I would be just fine having a drink or two. Honestly if I hadn’t read so many stories on here about people trying to moderate and finding out the hard way that they can’t, I think I would have attempted it.
    Good luck chickie! Hope it isn’t too rough of a restart for you 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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